Pregnant at 19

Photo by Ilzy Sousa on

I found out I was pregnant on October 31, 2015.

The only reason I found out I was pregnant was because I had kept getting sick off and on for the past couple of weeks. I thought I was just getting the stomach flu. I had no idea that it was morning sickness.

I had planned to go trick or treating in my neighborhood that evening. I got sick again and wasn’t feeling well. My mom knew that something was wrong with me because I was looking forward to this for weeks.

My mom had made my custom and trick or treat was actually on Halloween. I was extra excited. But then I was doubled over on the steps, feeling nauseous and my stomach hurt.

So, my parents talked me into going to stat care. I eventually agreed. Even though I hate doctors and always have. It was not how I wanted to spend Halloween night.

We got to stat care and they want to do a pregnancy test. Of course, they do reason number one why I hate doctors the first thing they do for a female whenever she is sick is make sure she isn’t pregnant. Doctors having been doing this to me since I was like 16. It’s kind of ticked me off. I was pretty sure I wasn’t pregnant. They’ve done this to me before and it came back negative and then they actually have to figure out what is wrong. So, I sat there with my mom at stat care waiting for the results of what I assumed to be lazy doctors that didn’t want to figure out what was really wrong with me. I was 19 at the time. When the doctor came back in and told me the test came back positive, I was shocked. I didn’t know how to react to that news. The doctor could tell that both my mom and I were in shock and brought the test result paper in to show us.

When we left stat care, I was worried I was going to get kicked out. My adoptive parents had always said if I got pregnant, I would be kicked out. My mom had told me it would be fine. I told her to tell my dad and make sure I wasn’t in hitting range when she did. My dad took it surprising well.

The next step was to call my OB and set up an appointment which I did that Monday. They told me they had to do a pregnancy confirmation. In my head I was like what if stat care was wrong and when I go in for my appointment it comes back negative. So, I didn’t tell anyone else until I went to that appointment. Well, there test came back positive as well. This is when it really sank in for me. I am pregnant.

I told my best friend that I’ve know since middle school. Her first response was I’m the God mom right. And I told her yes of course. That’s true friendship in my opinion. The first person I told at school was Emily. At that time, she wasn’t one of my best friends but she came to be. I’m not even sure why I told her first. She offered to tell the dad for me. I wasn’t sure how to tell him.

He denied even being able to have kids. Which was a lie because I hadn’t been with anyone else beside him even if it was only a two-week fling which I am not proud to say. He even asked me if I was on the pill which I was. No birth control is 100% effective.

I just ignored him for the time being. I went to my next doctor appointment and found out I was 11 weeks pregnant. It took almost the whole first trimester for me to figure out I was pregnant. Again, I was shocked. I got the ultrasound pictures from that appointment. Before the semester was over, I figured I needed to personally talk with Gabe, my daughters’ father. We were all sitting around in the common area where we all played video games and what not before we got kicked out too many times for being too loud. I got the nerve to walk up to Gabe and asked him hey can I talk to you in private for a second. He agreed. We walked around the corner from everyone else just for a little privacy from the group. I told him I was pregnant and that he was the father. He tried to say he didn’t know how this was possible. I was shocked at first like seriously dude. Then he tried to explain that he was sterile. So, my come back was why did you ask me if I was on the pill if you are sterile. Then it wouldn’t matter or not if I was on the pill. Then he tried to save himself from that probably thinking I wouldn’t have remembered that. He said well he has a small chance of getting a girl pregnant and the older he gets the less chance there is or some bull like that. I didn’t really have anything to say to that. We stood in silence for a minute. I asked him if he wanted to see the ultrasound photos. Which he declined. Then one of his friends came around the corner and asked him to go to the bathroom with him. I’ll save you from what he said exactly cause its gross that you would take a friend to do that with. He walked away. I stood there for another second not sure what I should do. In my mind I told him and my job was done. If he didn’t want to be a father well then, I was doing this on my own who needs him. I didn’t want to be with him anyway.

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